The Three Best Ways To Support Your Loved One's Mental Health During The Holiday Season

 Suicide and Self Harm Prevention In Prisons and Jails

As they wheeled him out of the building on that gurney, my stomach tightened in knots. His white prison uniform was splattered with blood and his head rolled in the way you'd expect an unconscious persons head to roll. I turned to my coworkers and said, "This isn't okay." During the holiday season there is a spike of suicide attempts in our Nations prisons and jails. While the months of November and December are times of celebration for those in the free world, the holidays are just another reminder for your loved one that they are away from you. As a supporter of someone doing time, there are ways you can make a difference in your loved ones life, and decrease the chances they will try to harm themselves here are three:

1. Reach Out (Connect With Your Loved One)

People who have never spent time incarcerated cannot begin to fathom how much your loved one thinks about you. Inmates spend countess hours looking at photos, sharing stories with friends, and trying to relive the good times of the past. Time can inadvertently cause walls of separation to be built because life goes on, you get busy, and you may not feel like you have anything to say. Regardless of any seasons of silence or disconnection between you and your loved one, I implore you to take a few minutes to reach out, connect with your loved one, and let them know you are thinking about them and sending your love. One connection can make all the difference!

2. Remind Them Of Their Worth (Affirm)

With the constant barrage of negative voices in your loved ones ears telling them they are nothing but a prison number, you have the power to change the narrative. One member of my chosen family regularly reminds me, "We're still here," so I don't forget that I have people on my team. When you affirm the value your loved one has in your life they get a little reminder that they are part of something larger than themselves. Disconnected feelings can produce depression and despair. When my support system tells me how glad they are to hear my voice, I am refueled for the week. Affirming your loved ones importance, significance, and value in your life can pull them out of any funk they may have as a result of incarceration.

3. Renew Your Commitment To Them (Togetherness/Not Alone)

If too much time has passed since you reached out to your loved one, use the holiday season to renew your commitment to that relationship. You may have to set new expectations for how you'll support, love, and encourage, but there is no better time like the holiday season to renew your commitment to your loved one. The power dynamics of the relationship are imbalanced and you have more control in terms of answering the phone, sending photos, and financial help, but I am convinced, that even if you've been missing in action for a long while, your loved one will be thrilled to have you back in their life. This holiday season, renew your commitment to your loved one and remind them they are NOT alone!

A Little Goes A Long Way

Holiday season depression is a real thing in prison. Whether you choose to reach out to your loved one, remind them of their worth, reaffirm your commitment to them, or all the above, you matter to them. Your words and your actions to your loved one will help make sure this holiday season is one of life, love, and hope instead of one of depress and despair. Your loved one needs you today! Thank you for all you do and for all you are.

Contact Trent directly by creating a Securus e-messaging account at SecurusTech.net or on the Securus App. You'll need his full name, State, and facility (Trenton Blythe, Texas, Texas Department of Criminal Justice). He'd love to hear from you!